Katlan | Moody Mombie

For the mother who strives to change herself in the new year for all the wrong reasons.

It’s that time of the year where almost everyone is self-reflecting. They’re taking time to look back on what they did this year & begin planning out the goals that they want to achieve in the new year.

Did you achieve your goals in 2021? What are your plans for 2022?

As you begin to create your new goals for 2022, remember to be realistic. Instead of aligning your goals with society’s standards, create goals that best align with your life.

What Do You Want To Achieve & Why?

For every goal that you make, ask yourself the following question: Am I setting this goal because I want to or because society says that I should?

When you find yourself making goals because society says that you should, I recommend that you trash them. It’s 2021. It’s time to stop letting society control your life.

Let’s work through an example. Loosing weight is a very popular New Year’s resolution, is it one of yours?

Though popular, this goal can be very toxic if it’s not made for the right reasons. Do you want to loose weight so that you can fit into society’s unrealistic expectations for what bodies look like? Or do you ultimately strive to become a healthier version of yourself in the new year?

If you want to be healthier, you should reword your goal. Instead of focusing on loosing weight, simply focus on being healthier. In doing so, you’ll place more of an emphasis on creating a healthier lifestyle instead of stressing out and most likely using toxic weightloss tactics.

Take A Trip By Yourself

If you’re like me, you probably hardcore struggle with anxiety & mom guilt, so this goal may seem impossible to achieve.

Let’s talk it out.

Taking a trip by yourself doesn’t have to mean that you have to plan a huge get away for yourself. It could be something as simple as visiting the new store you’ve wanted to go to without bringing your kids with you.

No matter the size of your trip, make sure that you do it by yourself. I know leaving the house without your kids is hard. I’m 7 months postpartum with my second and I still guilt myself for doing anything without my children. Tbh, on Christmas Day I tried to drive to my mom’s house to pick up food without my kiddos but mom guilt had other plans. I wasn’t even 5 minutes away from my home when I decided to turn around & let my husband pick up the food instead.

Make More Time For Self-Care

You deserve to shower for more than 10 minutes-without being interrupted. In fact, you deserve so much more than that.

In 2022, I want you to set aside at least one day a month where you solely focus on taking care of yourself. Now I know, that might seem a little crazy. You probably laughed while reading that sentence. You might even be questioning if I’m actually a mom. Heck, even I questioned this goal when I first wrote it down, but then I reminded myself that not only is this goal realistic, but it’s also necessary for me to be the best version of myself in 2022.

Start small then go big! And when the mom guilt and anxiety tries to ruin your day, throw back a couple margs and keep moving forward. If you’re not a margarita gal, remind yourself that you can’t pour from an empty cup.

Prioritize Your Mental Health

Mental health is one of the most under discussed topics in motherhood because society wants you to believe that suffering from a mental illness makes you a bad mother. This belief is dated and has always been 100% inaccurate.

Please, please stop suffering in silence. When January 1st hits, I want you to make that appointment that you’ve been avoiding. Heck, stop reading this post and make the appointment now.

If you don’t want to make an appointment, share your struggles with a loved one or find an activity that helps improve your mental health.

Do what you need to do to ensure that you’re taking care of your mental state just as well as you are taking care of children. And most importantly, NEVER shame yourself for prioritizing your mental health over anything.

Create A Must Visit List For 2022

If you don’t think this goal is important, scroll past this section. Or keep reading to understand why visiting places that you’ve always dreamed of is a goal that you need to set for 2022.

Before I became a mom, I was very spontaneous. I went on unplanned adventures as often as I could. My husband always says that he’s thankful that we’re together because without me, he’d never leave home.

Today I’m lucky if I go outside to check the mail. I’d like to say that this is mainly because of COVID but I can’t. After I brought a new being into the world many of my character traits faded away, being spontaneous was one of them.

Jumping in the car not knowing where I’m going used to bring me so much joy, but now it stresses me out. I long for the days where I never knew where I was going but somehow always managed to have an awesome adventure.

Do you feel the same way? If your answer is yes, let’s change that. In 2022, I want you to visit the places that you’ve only visited in your dreams.

Life is too short to waste time wishing that you had done more. So stop wishing and start doing! I promise you won’t regret it.

Reconnect With The Woman You Used To Be

Who were you before you became a mom? Were you daring? Did you go out more often? It’s time for you to reconnect with that version of yourself.

So, how can you achieve this goal? I used social media to rediscover myself. Through creating content that aimed to empower other mothers, I simultaneously empowered myself.

If you’re not a fan of social media, or you simply just don’t want to share your story online, you could do things the old fashioned way by starting a journal.

For your first entry, write about the woman that you currently are. Then, flip to the last page and write about who you used to be. As each day goes by, start each entry by writing about who you currently are then try to connect who you are now to the person you used be.

Let’s explore an example. Perhaps today you were a mom who cooked three meals for a toddler who didn’t eat any of them. And maybe in the past you were simply a woman who loved to cook. Would you prefer to view yourself as an annoyed mother who cooks food for an ungrateful toddler or as a woman who has fun in the kitchen while trying to figure out what her child will eat?

I’d much rather be the second version.

Changing the narrative and adjusting your perspective is a key aspect in remembering who you used to be. If you choose to explore this activity, let me know by leaving a comment below or sharing a post online & tagging me on TikTok or Instagram.

Closing

All of the goals above are suggestions based on the topics that I see many mothers discuss online-including myself.

You can choose to make the same goals that you always set: loose weight, eat healthier, yatta yatta. Or you can sit down and take time to make realistic goals that actually align with what you want to achieve in life.

Are you going to be your own person in 2022 or are you going to be the person that society wants you to be?

The choice is yours queen.

As always, thank you for taking time out of your busy day to read my post. I appreciate your support more than you’ll ever know!

xoxox,

Katlan